Thursday, November 14, 2013

TAKING THE PISS?

Image: WP Clipart


Italians love their cars and Modicans, I would say, more than most: every one of them will tell you, "We have a transport system that doesn't work" but this doesn't seem to matter because, as a student told me some years ago, "Only old people use it." "Thanks very much", said I.

So frustrated am I by the infrequency of Modica's buses that, whenever I go to Catania, I am like a child let loose in some Christmas wonderland at the sight of buses that actually appear to be going somewhere and bus stops placed in locations where people might want to alight.

Using your car for every journey is all very well but, in these days of the crisi - which is showing few signs of abating in Italy - it is, more than ever, costly. Help, however, may be on hand from our neighbours in Sardinia, where on Tuesday entrepreneur Franco Lisci unveiled a plan to use urine as petrol. This is not a new idea but it is new to Italy and Mr Lisci was very happy to demonstrate the use of a filter made of 100% Sardinian wool to isolate impurities. 

By all accounts the plan could work and help not only the Italian environment but the health and purses of the country's citizens as the use of urine as fuel for cars and for the running of domestic appliances would not only be cheaper but would reduce CO2 emissions.

Two questions come to mind:  firstly I would like to know how long it will take the Italian government to think up a way of taxing the stuff - not long, I suspect - and I have visions of everyone walking about with those pretty revenue stamps of which Italian officials are so fond attached to their private parts. Secondly, from whom is the quantity of urine required to be procured? I do have a suggestion:  Get it from the politicians, Italy.

3 comments:

rosaria williams said...

You're on a roll...
I don't know whether to take this seriously or not.

Nicholas Temple said...

There is a very old joke about Europeans and their automobiles:

For a Frenchman, his car is a symbol of his penis.
For an Italian, his car is an extension of his penis.
For an Englishman, his car IS his penis.

Welshcakes Limoncello said...

It's true, Rosaria! Haha, Nick!

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